|About||1 week ago|
I WANT ONE!!!!!!!!!!! WHERE CAN I BUY ONE?????
.....aaaaaaand basically useless. Except for reposting...
Okay, Son Wukong has officially been reincarnated.
Anything is a dildo if you're brave enough.
Asians are pretty easy to buy
Have you checked your local Ninja shop
Also need for various reasons
Oh no I’m so afraid of your hollow aluminum dildo
This is some Capsule Corp shit. Where can I buy one?
I don't think Asians are for sell.
She would kick your ass up one side and down the other before you had a chance to speak.
As thin as that metal has to be, it's a cool little practice weapon.
Wish.com, I got 4 for $6+$4 shipping. They are a massive pain in the ass to get back contracted
Hold it up to your hole and extend it
Ya okk.. I want one too.. and one of those expanding metal stick thingies she has..
Lmk if you find out
I'm not putting that in my pocket!
Wish thinks I want a 4 pack of clear plastic bras and cock socks.
Any of ya'll remember that fat guy that spun a stick like that about. It's pretty much an artifact of a video.
Shame it won't have any strength in horizontal strikes.
Ooh Libya will not be happy to hear about this.
Cock socks you say?
Yes, multiple. That's the best part
I know! Just imagine when it snaps and you got a nice little set of dual wielding shivs
I cant find it
Holy fuck the tension in that shit must be insane
Its called the appearing cane, amazon has them
Wish propagates it's products based on your internet history.
well, they're not made of gophers for one
I think I have been to the bar where he works in Thailand
Oi thats magic bruv
It's mostly smoke and mirrors inside
I was kinda amazed to see a B5 meme that didn't have a Ranger Battle Staff in it
“Hey guys, you ever see that really old movie, Empire Strikes Back?”
extending, not opening. idiot.
Hit it with a toothpick and it bends
So... not very durable then?
What are they called on wish?
Or maybe it's made out of super magic metal party pooper.
That will probably break on the first hit
Can I please just have a force lance from Andromeda?
Emergency stripper pole. For when you need to Hoe on the Go
That's the magic shop!
Saudi Arabia sure as hell weren’t when they found out
Cool for show but that thing would be totaled once you hit someone with it
And you don't?
She doesn't look Minbari...
next up the new "meme" of a cat with "I Can Has Cheezburger?" as the text.
Great surprise weapon though. Gotta be disposable after the first strike? It's just a long ribbon coil spring whip action something or other
they seemed cool but like star trek's second generation phasers, would be awkward to actually use.
That's what I was thinking. If I could make sure it will stay compact while traveling, it would be nice to take with me to practice kata.
How is this not a grower? Not show-errrr
Damn where can i get one?
Please say it’s for “science”
With the structural integrity of a fishstick
It's the asian woman that you have to smuggle from black market.
Human trafficking is a vibrant trade
It’s not. Says on the site that it’s not meant for fighting.
Reply = topComment(upvote) * 2
Goku's power pole hell yeah
Ok so this how Batman's utility belt has so many things.
Is that an extendable spinny stick you have in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
Nah, I still have last month's surplus.
There is a "stiff joke" in here somewhere, I just can't figure the angle out
they are easy to get. but, once they get their green card or American citizenship after marriage. They will leave you.
Lost the coder pin though
But a short-term lease is totally doable.
That's right boys, play it safe...er
I mean, surprise yes, weapon though? I don't think this thing has enough mass behind it to actually be used as a weapon.
It's like hitting with a empty toilet paper roll.
menbari lance? we live for the one, we die for the one
your attackers may not know that
How we feel.. unfortunately not how it really is =[
*penis accidently unpins it* *gets impaled*
I didn't think there were... 6... God of High School fans on here. +1
Obligatory: That's what she said.
If it dinged anything in practice it would no longer function tho, thing must be paper thin lol
This is some comic book shit
At the $2 shop
Not sure if pulling the pin while it's in sensitive tight spots would be the smartest move. Sharp edges and all.
I just finished watching Austin Powers. She’s fit right in
What is a cock sock?? ?
Yeah I'm gonna need one of those like now
Alrighr sun wukong
I got mine at a Vietnamese black market sale.
Yeah about that, try with your hand next time, works better...
Calm down Vlad.
Wheres the chill? My God there isn't any.
That cannot possibly be heavy enough to hurt someone seriously
Is your penis just a 3rd hand too?
I've had this idea ever since i saw Robin on the original Teen Titans
.......you know sunwukong isn't just from that.
I've seen this with some nerdy man and it was so nerdy, now it's a beautiful woman and way more people like/want it. Marketing y'all!
The Vietnamese dong is extremely weak right now
Does Sun Wukong have a resizeable staff in any of his other depictions, tho?
Oh hell neat
Mine didn't come with one, but if yours did, hey good for you for getting a free accessory.
PS -I know your joke had a double entendre, yes the currency is crap. Her and I are planning to visit, she's a CBV.
Put it up your butt
Yes. Pretty much all of them I believe?
Is... is she a Ranger?
Another fine product brought to you by Capsule Corp.
Haven't you seen Preditor? That's metal not on our periodic table.
Meh, just a few bruises...
Enough truth to it to make me very careful of opening it in front of other people
Thats what she said!
I want to watch her TV show
startled; minus 5 resolve
What's a metal party pooper?
Damn I found a new fire staff I want.
Ear hole right?
So did my dick.
Kata? I though all neck beards studied the blade....
They come in shipping containers
In literally every one, hell goku even has one in dragon ball.
How do you retract it once you're done?
Maybe Wish knows you better than you know yourself...
See above then
My penis became the big penis
Thank you! This gentleman understands!
I’m definitely gonna buy one
If you line it up right, why not both?
I like your style
That's hollow as fuck. It would break real quick. Still, kinda cool.
Its because theyre overproduced
Considering the weight would be way pff, I'm not so sure
It would be the equivalent of striking with air in the shape of a stave
Okay okay you can’t *legally* buy people anymore.
Could be more of a liability thing. Might kill some people with a stave of magic metal.
If this was anime. That thing would weight 500 pounds or more. Lol
What does CBV mean, if you don’t mind me asking ?
Thats gotta be thin enough to be razor sharp, seems like a bad idea.
i have one of spring steel; not only is it strong af but you can give it a lil twist and it stiffens up extra. could def knock someone out.
Probably not - but they've more than likely seen Predator.
They're $2 on wish....
Probably wish I've seen that shit spammed on there next to the strap ons.
So much of blood from the periods
Make it out of a hard stainless or spring steel and it's hit pretty hard, without losing durability. Capsule would only weight ~15 - 20lbs
It looks different.
Also on Aliexpress (for those who hate Wish because it sends daily spam even when you explicitly disallow marketing e-mails).
Cock blocking vagine
Yo anybody else notice some Asian girls are getting booty now
I just stole the link from someone else. They sure do look like they'd take about 10cents to make.
Even though this may be a guy, I stand by my statement.
Even wukong has one in league of legends.
It's not. With all honesty you should get your eyes checked if they look like different products.
E X P A N D D O N G
I mean a stab with it would definitely hurt, though make it useless as well. And still would be a poor weapon
Can you imagine that going of in your pocket lol
Yep. I concur.
What is that thing called
You can use it like that or pull the cord then shove it down someone's throat.
Or bamboo. You ever been hit with bamboo?
idk, appearing cane? i inherited mine when a magician passed and left me his chest. never had to buy one.
It’s an “appearing cane.” If you don’t know what you’re doing, they’re actually super dangerous to open.
Yes, it's in the original Journey to the West from the 16th century. Monkey shrinks it to the size of a needle and hides it behind his ear.
That’s gotta fuckin story behind it. Now that you’ve revealed that much, finnnnnisssshhhh itttttttt
Advertised product is not available at all locations.
A sock for a cock. Often sold in pairs for no particularly good reason.
We found out.
Yes, it's part of the original story. 如意金箍棒. He gets it in the first few chapters of Journey to the West.
Haven't been to Asia then?
Before or after it's extended?
Where was this when I was looking for a shower rod?
Is this one of those edits or is that like aluminum foil thin?
I said, "...if you're brave enough."
where can you get this?
Well, you learn something every day.
The Democratic Republic of Myanmar is usually a safe bet, but the shipping costs are exorbitant unless you purchase an entire sea can
they have collapsable bo staffs the same action as police batons but that's gotta be the tiniest i've ever seen
Wasn't it a needle that he could change to any size?
That's why you get four of them :D
Yes, the staff is called the Ruyi Jingu Bang in the original Chinese stories.
I know a den'bok when I see one.
It wouldn't weigh enough to be even vaguely useful
Structural integrity of a souffle.
So basically a flimsy version of a telescoping baton
...that's like being like "Zeus?" "Oh dude I love Percy Jackson!" "No, no...Zeus is a Greek God, much older source..."
Imagine someone trying to kidnap you and you whip this out of thin fucking air.
I can’t imagine why I’d need 4
Pretty much any place that sells magic supplies
Dangerous too, I got one the metal is super sharp, got many paper cuts, and it slipped and opened in my hand, cut off a chunk of my finger..
Haha good analogy. I knew Wukong was a mythical character & that Goku was based off him. But thought the staff was unique to this manga.
Could just push back into coils if you try to stab someone. Maybe whacking is better.
Would be great for cosplay.
yup. keep searching. If you find yourself crying for no reason, you're getting close.
"Alright now I didnt want to have to do this-" thing fucking explodes in my pocket.
......... dumb but guiuine question. How much length can a girl take until she dies?....
From what movie is this? I can't remember.
Is Goku Midnight Eye dead then?
Doesn't matter how thin it is, I still wouldn't want to be hit with it.
Can't have much mass at the ends to produce any real power. I.e. you would probably stuggle to really hurt someone withthis.
I've been close my whole life!
Star Wars Kid: The Next Generation
OMG I love you
Put it in a sock, instant blackjack.
Biggest dot of my life
I hate to tell you, but metal not on our periodic table would generally not exist within our universe.
Yeah. I'd like it better if it were a few inches longer to include some solid weights at the ends.
Everything's a shiv if you're determined enough..
Is it strong enough to be used as a weapon? This would be a fantastic item to keep in my purse for emergencies
You are thinking of Marcus. Lennier didn't learn the staff until after he joined the Rangers. Before then he knew how to separate your >
> bones from your other bones without breaking them.
Lmao! I laughed too hard picturing this
I’m sure it has already been turned into a deadly weapon in a prison somewhere
15lbs of spring steel, at the very minimum, would be about 3 coconuts large (52 cubic inches). You're just talking out of your ass.
I'm surprised it doesn't snap even at that low speed.
When she thought u lil but she hasn't seen you hard
Nami? Is that you?
Grower not a shower
Not necessarily, it's thought there's an island of stability yet to be found for superheavy elements that don't form naturally.
Or maybe the first strike bends it. second strike uses the bend as a unblockable strike. This breaks it off. Then third strike uses piercing
Kung Pow! Enter The Fist
...for that you just need to pull hard.
Make one end pointy.
Google 'appearing cane.'
I mean I'm guessing aluminum, but the right steel might at least give it a sharp sting, and it's still gotta be intimidating
it's also been done in Babylon 5 (the rangers use that weapon)
The reach might come in handy, keeps away knives and blows to the head will he easier
i legit just ordered one of these
Is this a grenadestick?
It would probably feel like getting hit with a cardboard tube but damn I want one!
Can't see any difference. Cool af.
I've heard of it, but (1) no proof, (2) no good math suggesting it, & (3) don't form naturally so there aren't any in our universe
Canadian born Vietnamese.
Holy shit I did not expect those to ever actually exist
Wasn't 118 created a while ago?
You have done well my dude.
did he use a staff? yes? then it's all good.
Being tiny somewhere else
I didn't say I made a good gif...
As a machinist I know some metals that even that thin you can drive a truck over and won't damage it.
Or, just keep it closed & wrap your fist around it to add mass to your punch.
And open it in pocket by accident.
So this is what gets fake internet points now? Stuff that's been sold in magic shops for the past 50 years?
Summon'er then cum on'er
Would freak the shit out of a would-be mugger though...
Great response I’m dying over here.
Just like my erection
You're aint fighting someone in armor here, I'd like to see you stand strong after being whipped in the face with that thing swong correctly
I'd let her wank-- I MAN WHACK-- whack me a couple times
Famous last words
Thought to be found ≠ found and it they do they be on our periodic table just not discovered. The PSE is a system to chart elements
I want one
Like an erection
'Kata' just refers to forms/patterns, there's sword kata too
In the original depiction, in Journey to the West, he usually shrinks it to the size of a needle and hides it behind his ear.
It was a pillar that pinned the ocean tides. But he shrunk it to needle-size for storage.
It was an iron pillar, but he made it as small as a needle and kept it behind his ear.
i think i have a fetish for girls that can kick my ass
One for each hand! Minus two.
I was hoping someone would bring this up
Unless that staff hurts anyone who uses one in a real street fight is getting shot or beat. Look s cool af though.
Isn’t Babylon 5 relevant here? I seem to remember the ranger guy having one.
Damn it got sidetracked again came here for the funnies and now I spent the last 30 min looking for appearing canes
That is like a fishing rod with a spring system
That escalated quickly
Hi dots, I'm Dad
Literally got another email from them while I was reading this
You'll shoot ypur eye out kid!
Also on AliExpress.com, for those who hate Wish because it sends daily spam even when you explicitly disallow marketing e-mails.
Holy shit biscuits
am I the only one who thinks it's too expensive?
Put it in your butt.
If you're going to be pedantic about word choices, at least have the dignity to use proper grammar.
And all the fucking internet black belts come out to argue whether it's an effective weapon.
you should check usernames.
That won't survive even light contact with, well, anything.
Ah yes a truly tactical weapon which changes with each strike.
looks like a man idk
Can I has your number???.... okay i'll stop
Not important but I'm wearing the same top as her. I feel special.
A spear like this would be pretty cool. Even if it's basically just a really long needle.
jade looks really good in the new mortal kombat.
Am I the only one thinking this is a great prop for a Robin cosplay?
You would be surprised. The collapsible straight baton I use for work (cop) is very thin and let me tell you from experience it hurts a lot
Causing someone to feel pain momentarily is probably just going to make them angry. If they're out to hurt you before you slap them, they'll
likely just want to hurt you even more.
A poke in the eye hurts no matter how much mass is behind it
Next thing that will be ban onboard of airplanes ...
Portable stripping pole
Not really. Impressive looking, but give anything more than a light tap with it, it'll basically just crinkle, it's only light sheetmetal.
You can knock someone out with a tightly rolled up newspaper. It depends on how and where you hit, this weapon could be effective
You would cry like a bitch if she whooped your ass with that dildo
morons. morons everywhere.
Then you have two sticks. probably jagged metal edges too !
Minbari fighting pike, or Denn'bok.
Shes not doing it slowly because she's not better at it. Shes doing it because wind resistance would break that thin metal
Negging doesn't work on gifs dude.
Borderline capsule corps
I tried to make one many years ago. it was about a foot long, closed. One end opened great. The other end stuck all the time.
You give that back to Robin right now.
...LETS GET DOWN TO BUSINESS
Cut on the forehead = blood in the eyes, etc. Distraction is this kind of weapon's mainstay
I was so fucking happy to see B5 streaming on Prime
That seems on the level of putting a loaded gun down your pants pointed at your crotch, accidents are bound to happen.
She isn’t using that portable stripper pole right
Not convinced that's real.
Great until something knocks it in her purse and it springs open
Plastic over the window for privacy
Now dance around it
Dat tag doe
I want one too!
bamboo would be much heavier and stronger than this could possible be.
That would be denser and stiffer than this thing. This would be like getting hit with a straw.
Found it on Amazon but it has really bad reviews: People keep cutting themselves on its sharp edges. Are higher quality options available?
Who needs pepper spray when you can have this
It still possible to whoop someones ass with a straw, just dont swing it around, use its length to jab and pierce
Well I've not held this thing so I can't say for sure but I doubt it could be a very good weapon.
Sounds to me like a magician passed and left his chest to the guy
What!?! I’ve got to check later!
Aaahhh, very useless to know!
Instructions unclear. Skewered my leg through my ballsack
I thought it was like a grenade.
I wonder where that can be holstered for concealed carry?
It would probably be far better as a spearing weapon than a quarter/boo staff
I have the same reaction when the wife offers a BJ.
And will bend if looked at with too hard a stare....
she brave enough
You'd be surprised of what some materials are capable of today. Besides the shock factor of weapon from no where might be enough.
Don't put it in your ass!
I wannnnnt one
That thing probably weighs like one twentieth of an actual staff. Are you gonna act like that's no big deal?
Maybe if they had a soft spot in there head and you hit them at the perfect angle. I will stick with my back up baton with lead weighted tip
Unlatches inside my pocket and rips my pants off
My favorite line in the entire series!
She is going to be so disappointed when all small tubes don’t extend to that level.
Definitely a “grower”
Actually it came out of somewhere. It was that thing she was holding. It came out of there.
As it unwinds the sharp metal edges get whipped around at 100 mph and slash your face and you're blinded by blood in your eyes. But ya..Same
Want to be the next Robin starter kit!
Never said it qould be a _good_ weapon ;)
Marcus was the first thing I thought of
For warmth or so your feet socks don’t get crusty
Anything can be used if your brave enough
Wakandians have these, go ask them if you want.
They finally made robins crazy staff from teen titans
It's all fun and games until you put it in your backpocket and fall down and makeit extend.
Wouldn't be good in an actual beat down, but may be able to avoid the beat down. Guy talks shit, I tilt my fedora and that shit springs open
I know it’s not acceptable on Imgur to criticize anyone from that admin, but sorry (not sorry,) he’s a pedo.
Who gives a fuck about criticizing that admin, Joe is a fucking creep and should be in jail!
Imagine that shit going off in your car
Instant stripper pole!.. oh wait, no it's not...
But how brave is she?
Shouldn’t a metal dildo be made of “Vibranium”?
I wish I could upvote this again
They smuggle them in the anus
Honestly I’d be impressed
I know that well, but my thumb and the palm of my hand trying.
So funny story, I had one looked at it an thought "If I drop it will definitely go off". So I did, I dropped it... 1/2
The mistake I made was looking straight down at it. It came right back up and hit me square in the mouth. Best experience of my life. 2/2
yeah i mean, it was my uncle ray, he worked for like a decade as a street magician under the space needle in Seattle. 1/?
he also lived in a geodesic dome house he built and lived off the grid. when he passed I was given all his magic stuff, including books 2/3
I thought so to.
This is what I came to the comments section for.
Being creepy isn't a crime.
The way someone's always lurking to post something like this every time Biden gets mentioned or posted is suspicious as fuck.
that's awesome! Where can I buy one of those?
Because of its size it has to be thin enough to destroy it with bare hands
how thick is it?
There's an island out in the Pacific you don't know about, does that mean it doesn't exist? No! Just because something we haven't discovered
..Is being viewed for the first time doesn't mean it doesn't exist. We just haven't learned and categorised it yet.
Next month there will be a very awkward x ray.
I’m just picturing Jose jalapeño on a stick... lol
That is super neat. I wish I could visit and see your uncles life and his home. Sounds captivating. You must be awesome too. God speed!
Haha don't let 'em bother you... they're fake points anyway!
Did she steal one of Bruce Wayne's gadgets ?
Imagine that going off in your car
Enough disguises Sun-Wukong
That's not the same. It's more like someone saying "there might be 5-headed-green-aliens in the pacific we haven't discovered yet."
hey thanks. yeah he was a super interesting guy, I wish i knew him a lot more when i could. you're probably pretty awesome yourself.
Same concept...... So, where's this 5 headed green beast located?
Gifts, because you have friends?
I'm pretty sure Lennier could fight before coming to Babylon 5, and the warrior caste used those staffs as much as the rangers.
Journey to the West?
You can buy it on amazon i saw it in a matthias youtube vid
I bet you’re pretty awesome, seeing as y’all were cut from the same cloth :)
I actually just didn't realize they came in a 2-pack, so I thought I was buying 2, not 4
That is me reading this thread
I never said that was your intent... ;)
Goes off in pocket. Bank teller notices your masssive bulge amd gives you her number 👍
"It's a Minbari fighting pike, several hundred years old. You're just jealous because you don't have one."
Lennier was Religious Caste.
And if you read what I said, I didn't say he couldn't fight. He put Marcus in a corner with one arm.
diddly doddly doot dot
Thank you, I couldn't remember the nsme
Gene roddenberry's Andromeda as well
They don't go into his early training, but they do show he can fight. I assume all Minbari that can fight use the weapons of the warrior ca
“Said the Lurker”
You should've checked post history.
“Proclaimed the lurker”
You'd have to be pretty skilled to do that. You're more likely to wack them on the side of the head, causing them to just curse at you.
Many of the 6000 and 7000 series of aluminum as well as vasco t and c stainless. With proper heat treating vasco is about 600k to break
600k per square inch. Its used in bike frames, as tool steel, and other stuff
Hollow at .025" thickness?
A solid 15 pound block would be 860 cubic centimeters, or about a "quart" of milk in volume. It can't be solid, so it would be even larger.